DIALING UP THE FEMINISM

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I've been feeling so inspired by women lately. They can just be so powerful and badass. I know I keep vaguely mentioning this, but I have been going through a hard time recently and I've been trying to expose myself to things that bring me joy and make me happy. Because of that, I've been drawn to strength, drawn towards inspiring people, and so many of them are women. And honestly, as my love and admiration for women grows, so too does my frustration with men. I feel like I'm supposed to hold back on my hatred for men, like that makes me one of those radical bra-burning feminists who the media love to focus on to discredit the cause. And trust me, I get it, I know all men aren't bad. For example, my dad is the best. He's just great.

But let's be honest, in general, men kinda suck. And I feel like the argument that not all men are bad that people like to yell when a woman starts talking about how awful men are, well, it's not really the point, is it? It feels like a distraction tactic, like instead of focusing on what matters, we're going to bicker about semantics. But there is this fear of being seen as crazy, as a crazy feminist. It's ingrained in woman from a young age, that they shouldn't be too over-bearing. And it's funny because that idea, of the hysterical woman, has been used for centuries. Even the word "hysterical" comes from the latin for ovaries, that word is inherently female. It's been consistently used to discredit woman throughout history.

But of course we're angry. Of course we're frustrated.

I remember seeing the new Blade Runner film last year with my friends and the conversations we had afterwards. To be honest, I didn't think the movie as a whole was that great. I mean, I don't dislike Ryan Gosling but there was a lot of him in that movie. Like it's literally just 3 hours of his face. I can't think of a single scene he wasn't in. But my main issue with the film was the portrayal of women. It's bad. Really bad. I don't want to give any spoilers but essentially they're pretty much all sexualised and/or computer generated. When we came out of the cinema, my friends and I discussed the movie and one of my male friends said 'well aside from the portrayal of women, the story line was good'. And it's not that I disagree completely, but the thing is, I can't put the portrayal of women to the side.

My best friend Aoife and I agreed while walking to the bar, we can't get past a negative or damaging portrayal of woman anymore. We're just tired. Tired of coming out of films feeling so hopeless about society. Tired of feeling bad about ourselves even though we know the problem is with society, not us. So, instead of falling even further into that hole of self-loathing, I'm trying to feel empowered by the anger I feel. I won't let it get the better of me. I will use it to be productive.

And so, as I said, I feel myself being drawn towards inspiring women. I don't know why it's taken me so long, but I suddenly discovered that I love the band Haim. They're so amazing. Their music is great but I've also loved watching interviews with them and stalking their social media. They are confident and unapologetic about who they are and what they believe. I've probably been a bit too inspired by them recently and may or may not have spent some time daydreaming about becoming the 4th sister... I mean, I already have the hair, right? I'm kidding but their style is what inspired my latest boot purchase from NAE Vegan. Maybe I was consciously hoping that walking in HAIM inspired shoes will help me feel more confident in my feminism. Plus, they're ethically made from sustainable vegan materials. What more could you want?

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I came across the image below on twitter while I was procrastinating earlier today and it really hit home. That's what I need to do. I have to ignore the pressure I feel to tone it down and not entertain the stupid semantic arguments. Instead, I need to focus on women who are turning up the dial and follow their lead. Focus on how amazing and strong women are, how amazing and strong I am, because that's the only way we're going to make waves and create change so that we don't have to come out of films feeling angry about society and depressed about ourselves.

Love Jane x

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